Wyv's Map Review: Dankventures[former Tgh Map]

Ms.Spooks · February 3, 2017

Yes, hi, and hello. Today I'm going to talk about the very controversial map, Edventures. This was both a requested map review and a personal map review.

This map is trash.

We're done go home.

Ok fine I guess I owe you all reasoning about why this map is so awful. Covering our basis let's talk about this biggest issue with this map, the bad memes. Meme maps aren't inherently bad by default. However there is a certain amount of over saturation and audio spam that brings you to the edge of insanity. Every time this map was on I consistently heard 13 year old and younger kids impersonating the "We need some wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeels" meme that gets played every time you step into the go karts. They were buggy by nature and had a "nifty" little button that made them go faster. Anyone in front was instantly killed. and of course like everything else on this map had some nice audio spam of an engine running. This is the tip of the iceberg folks. Buckle in cause we're in for a long ride.

There was a default track of Ed, Edd, and Eddy's theme playing in the background. While nostalgic, it became repetitive after a while. By nature it's not bad. Except for the random tracks of laughing, "allah akbar"-ing(from dropping a bomb,) and screaming from cows having sex on a trailer's roof(assuming you were near that area.) All of these things caused a lot of noise pollution. This is assuming you're lucky enough not to have the walky talkies being spammed, cut, and replayed. Those cursed words of "when you stub your toe" still echo on the deepest levels of my madness. There were more walky talkies hidden on the map but I'm not listing them all.

Now as I said this is a meme map with various easter eggs including Johnny test's severed head on a pike, Censored MLP porn, and many more trashy memes. The combination of audio and visual memes are enough to make most of sane thinking queezy. To this map's credit however, at least the memes are not overly saturated into a small area. Like many smaller maps tend to do, they shove as much content into a single space as possible to make up for poor quality. At least there is enough space to enjoy yourself before encountering the next meme, at least visually. It won't be long until you run across one though.

Next let's talk about the ever important map quality. It's as bad as the memes.

Now now clam the hell down and hear me out.

Yes I'm aware that the map is a reflection of the show it's based on. Ed, Edd, and Eddy by design were minimal. They were designed to be simple yet to the point. However, this map takes the concept too far in my opinion. Taking way too many liberties in lazy design. For starters the texture of the map is incredibly bland where everything not only is flat, but looks flat as well. What do I mean? If you were to look at the fences for example they have no shape. This would have been forgivable if the fences were consistent. The chain fences near the school actually have texture and shape. It's horrendous to look at visually. It doesn't end at fences either. Rooftops, trees and many other things have no shape. They literally are 2d models rendered in a 3d world. It's incredibly ugly

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The coloring and texturing of the environment are even worse. The map is a bunch of dull colors and flat textures that were slapped on. Now I want to point out that the show had detail in it despite it's minimalist nature. You had a certain about of depth that gave visual clues on the shape/texture of an object. The houses are a great example of this where they lose any kind of shading, layout, or design for a literal colored block for buildings. Here is a picture from the show of a house. You can see more detail in this 2d picture then you can on the in game 3d models. The glass has shine, the door appears wooden, the roof has a brick like texture to it. Hell even the pavement has more definition then the 3d models.

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Say what you will about me being harsh on the design elements, but I stand by my opinion that it was lazy. On a 2d plane they have an excuse for an image to appear flat. An animator doesn't have time to perfect the shape of a bush or roof. They just have to get the idea across. As a 3d model however, there is no excuse. "But it looks like the show" Yeah sure as a bland object I could have made with default blender items I could make an egg look like a bad spongebob pineapple. I'm not going to however because it would look bad. Same thing with this map. You have to make changes to make a 2d object into a 3d model. Including adding texture!

Alright in terms of actual gameplay this map isn't complete garbage. Still bad but not complete trash.

Lots of open space mixed with a niche little alley way maze allows for some fun playstyles you normally couldn't play on say hyrule. Outside of rocket and sticky pogo don't expect any sweet rocket jumps outside of occasionally hanging out on the roof. This map very heavily favors scouts, snipers, and pyros over other classes. The obstacles let scouts have a lot of fun sneaking around and causing mischief to snipers hiding in the neighborhood. Pyros have plenty of fun hiding in the alleyways waiting to catch their victims by surprise. Snipers can just sit behind a building or on a roof and have vision of almost every part of the map that isn't behind a fence/wall. So expect to be sniped, spawn camped by scouts, and dominated by ninja pyros. There isn't quite a lot to do on the map outside of finding the memes. There are a couple easter egg rooms including that bad meme room and a sheep room. Neither team is really favored over the the other in terms of spawns. They're both equally bad being teleport spawns, rather open, and unprotected. It's not the worst map to favor sniper but it is still not wise to walk out into the open.

Overall this map is bad. It attracts the worst of the tf2 community with bad lenny binds, memes, and other general garbage. I'm not even covering all the exploits the map had. It's a very bland map. It was poorly designed and executed. It's size does not compensate it's quality in any form. I'm glad the map was removed and you all should be happy too. It was funny for the first week it was added but after a while it starts to really show how bad it is. For those of you saying it's not based on a game, you're wrong. Look up Ed, Edd, and Eddies mis-adventures for gamecube/ps2 and you will be disappointed. There was a racing and pc game but we don't talk about those. I would never vote for this map, most certainly nominate it.

What? Why are you still reading?

I didn't forget anything! I Swear!

Wait.. What's that over the horizon!

"Hey Look everybody! Bad memes are BACK"

"We love you bad memes!"

Kill me.