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shwash

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    352

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Status Updates posted by shwash

  1. shwash

    Happy 22nd birthday to me!

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. shwash

      shwash

      I am now, but I had to be born sometime.

       

    3. Rainy

      Rainy

      Happy birthday you beast. Stay safe

    4. Thorax_

      Thorax_

      Happy Birthday!

  2. shwash

    The storm that the area I live in is currently having has had a reported 532 air to ground lightning strikes within it's duration. Happy 4th, friends!

    1. virr

      virr

      Stay safe buddy

    2. shwash

      shwash

      I mean it's over now but I appreciate the concern! It was a crazy storm though.

  3. shwash
    Back in the proverbial scammer shitpost saddle. It has been way too long.
    1. Aegean

      Aegean

      what happened?
    2. shwash

      shwash

      https://xenogamers.com/threads/41961/page-5#post-331107
  4. shwash
    First week of 2018 is proving to be an omen of things to come. Yay
  5. shwash
    My Status hasn't been updated for 5 days. It isn't my birthday anymore.
  6. shwash
    Happy 21st Birthday me!
    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. BonfireCentipede

      BonfireCentipede

      Happy 21st Birthday you!
    3. Egossi

      Egossi

      Congrats. Have fun. Drink.
    4. james8470

      james8470

      Daym how did I miss this
  7. shwash
    Stop changing your font.
    1. Thorax_

      Thorax_

      Ökæÿ
  8. shwash
    I can't sleep. Someone come over and beat me with a blunt instrument until I fall unconscious. I won't pay any money, but will appreciate it
    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. LAN_Megalodon

      LAN_Megalodon

      can the "blunt instrument" be my penis?
    3. shwash

      shwash

      the aforementioned blunt instrument you chose is not within the acceptable parameters to batter me until I am stripped of my conscious.
    4. realBelloWaldi

      realBelloWaldi

      i can hit you up with a blunt ;)
  9. shwash
    I love the word "exacerbate". I like word "radical" as well. Why don't people use them.
    1. ael_fjordling

      ael_fjordling

      sometimes i find myself exacerbated, which is pretty radical
  10. shwash
    My 21st Birthday is in a few weeks. Should I go to a bar or get blasted at home with some friends?
    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. shwash

      shwash

      I will ask for a plane ticket to Germany for my Birthday then c:
    3. shwash

      shwash

      Wait @[51806:@Bello] you are only 18? I thought you were in your 20s.
    4. realBelloWaldi

      realBelloWaldi

      I'm 17. I joined this clan when I was 14.
  11. shwash
    I could be really edgy and say that I didn't do anything for Father's Day, but that is edgy.
  12. shwash
    Bored of my old username. Decided to change things up a bit.
    1. Thorax_

      Thorax_

      Oh my, that is very fine.
  13. shwash

    0/10 Didn't throw that ass in the circle.
  14. shwash
    I found a dead body while geocaching.
    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. LAN_Megalodon

      LAN_Megalodon

      http://www.firewatchgame.com/
    3. Blizzard

      Blizzard

      pics or it didnt happen
    4. shwash

      shwash

      I took a picture, but the police broke my phone, as well as my face, and legal credibility.
  15. shwash
    Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buttholes.
    1. KSPlayer1337

      KSPlayer1337

      b u f f a l o B U T T H O L E S
    2. TBOHB

      TBOHB

      me too
  16. shwash
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEYAAAAAHN (Ian)
  17. shwash

    Change your profile pic to Steve Lichman
    1. Bone

      Bone

      Well, thanks for introducing me to a new comic I need to read
  18. shwash
    Hi.
    1. bagggel

      bagggel

      hi there
  19. shwash

    Did a Windows update Ddos you for the month again?
  20. shwash
    Bonnie Baby
    1. BonfireCentipede

      BonfireCentipede

      Bonnie baby is my favourite beanie baby
  21. shwash
    "If Lil' Wayne ever becomes a country singer, I will take a shit in the Statue of Liberty" Best thing I heard today from a human being.
    1. Thorax_

      Thorax_

      nice
  22. shwash
    I have a day off today, I am doing yard-work no one else wants to do.
  23. shwash
    I cannot face the world when rap songs use the Kill Bill whistle.
  24. shwash
    I got a day off tomorrow, what should I do?
    1. realBelloWaldi

      realBelloWaldi

      kill me
    2. shwash

      shwash

      I can't go to Germany and kill someone in one day, too impractical.
  25. shwash
    Overripe Grapefruit: Shwoos is a badass, man. Overripe Grapefruit: he'd suck dick for bus fare Overripe Grapefruit: then walk